We’ve all had arguments with…
husbands, wives, boyfriends, or our girlfriends. Bringing up feelings, things that bother you, or even a secret can really make approaching your better half uncomfortable. How can I approach a situation tactfully? Will they understand my point or be offended? And then, there are those turning points during a discussion that can turn into an argument, which can change the dynamic of it all. Either it gets settled or you end up walking away still upset. And let’s face it, that could end up setting the mood for the next week!
Some popular options for friction..
between couples have been: spending time apart, counseling or therapy, discussion exercises, and “proper arguing techniques”. Sometimes, when those options don’t work, couples decide that the best thing is to part ways. That can be pretty devastating; arguing doesn’t mean that you don’t like, love, or care for your mate. Quite the opposite; you care enough to bring up a topic with the knowledge that you simply may just disagree. Forget the tech science behind why people argue, and remember the sexual and intellectual chemistry of why you got together in the first place.
At Eve’s Lair we’ve developed our own therapy:
Argumentative Nakedness! During times of discord, one person or the other, or both, may feel vulnerable and that’s when the defensive behavior kicks in. Before you have that discussion, get naked! You’ll be on the same playing field as your partner, same vulnerability, and it would be unlikely that anyone would storm out. Plus, motivation for a “love chat” and resolution are much higher. Remember, it doesn’t have to lead to anything except for production conversation. The point is for both of you to truly be equal. Of course, if you happen to have make-up nookie, that’s ok too.
Pick a place at home where you feel comfortable; the kitchen table, the couch, the bedroom. Have fun with it, personalize it, expand on this therapy idea to fit your own relationship! Next time you want to discuss something, no matter what it is, get in the habit of practicing Argumentative Nakedness! Let us know how it works for you.